26475 replies to this topic

[Axtuse]

Getting out of a five year relationship has been pretty weird, but I now have an immunity to the "I want to grow old with someone" kick.

Life is WAY TOO SHORT to work on constantly appeasing others while making sure your needs are met. Besides, I have a 4 year old daughter and her 8 month old sister to worry about.

While I do miss the companionship and whatnot, living in my particular region absolutely terrifies me. I have a MUCH greater chance of landing a(n):

"I must live my entire life around you and what you do" chick
"Impregnate me and be my shining knight to save me from my worthless existence" chick
"I've probably fucked 6 of your closest friends and had triple the amount of boyfriends" chick

than a cool chick that I would find ideal. I want a chick that:

- Doesn't need me in order to exist or have an identity
- Will not change who she hangs out with, bother me with who I hang out with, or just change her life in general
- Will not make me feel bad for having zero interest in "going out on the town" and can just go do it herself when I don't want to go
- Wants to be with me because she wants to and feels like having me in her life makes it better. No other reason.

If I never find this woman, then oh well. The legacy we leave behind is about our accomplishments, how we affected the lives of others, how we may have bettered the species, and our children.

Who we wed or fucked around with is merely an "interesting fact".

---------

Wizwars, about the bush hogging. Just wet and part my man. Give that bush the Moses treatment and head for the Promised Land.

[mshell]

I really don't see what the big deal is about having a significant other request that you do something that they find more appealing. In the past I've had requests to trim certain areas or wear certain clothes to which I've complied because I believed that it would be more comfortable and attractive to the other person.

I guess we all draw the line somewhere; I'm not going to get my back waxed on my own volition, but if it REALLY bothered my partner and if she made that clear to me, then I would certainly consider doing it (it totally depends how deep the relationship is). It just seems silly to make such a broad generalization...then again, I know I've felt that way in the past.

Spook man, so sorry to hear that I'll toast a glass to you.

the big deal is. . . razor blades are fucking expensive and leg shaving is REALLY time consuming. It irritates my skin. It's something I really don't enjoy doing, and I don't see much benefit for myself. I'd rather spend my time doing something that actually benefits both of us and involves us spending time together. For example, I love cooking so I don't mind cooking meals for my significant other. I also will make time for us to go out and do something. I think this is a lot more beneficial to both partners than me simply complying and shaving my legs even though it's something expensive and time consuming and that I really don't want to do.

[weener]

I've found that having hairy legs tends to weed out the douchebags. I'm not saying that every guy that objects to hairy legs is a douchebag, but if that is a dealbreaker for a guy, THAT would be a dealbreaker for me. Guys who don't object tend to be more laid back about other stuff, too, although they may fart on you.

Are we in the same dimension? LOL. I don't think I could have gotten away with that with anyone I dated, and I think my ex would have literally knifed me. She couldn't even handle me farting around her.

I was in a band with 4 dudes who think that farting is basically the funniest thing on earth, and strongly encouraged me to blast them right along with them. So when I started dating one of those guys, it was only natural that he would still fart openly, at times pressing his ass cheeks up against me to fart directly on my body.

I'm laid back about farting, and I think it's a fair trade that a guy should be the same about my body hair. I never gave the Lad crap about his sideburns/beard, even though at times he had a soul patch that looked lame as hell. It's his body, and I'm not into double standards.

[weener]

the big deal is. . . razor blades are fucking expensive and leg shaving is REALLY time consuming. It irritates my skin. It's something I really don't enjoy doing, and I don't see much benefit for myself.

Mshell is right, shaving your legs sucks. Your legs are a huge part of your body, way more surface area than your face, armpits and whatnot, and you basically have to do it every day if you want to keep them smooth. You have to be really thorough, and there is the risk of cutting yourself. There's no hygenic reason to do it, and it's a huge hassle for how much good it does anyone.

[xoc]

I could understand if someone was a leg fetishist or into axilism - but if you [guys] spend a lot of time obsessing about legs and armpits, there are some other areas that you've missed.

[Shervz0r]

I really don't see what the big deal is about having a significant other request that you do something that they find more appealing. In the past I've had requests to trim certain areas or wear certain clothes to which I've complied because I believed that it would be more comfortable and attractive to the other person.

I guess we all draw the line somewhere; I'm not going to get my back waxed on my own volition, but if it REALLY bothered my partner and if she made that clear to me, then I would certainly consider doing it (it totally depends how deep the relationship is). It just seems silly to make such a broad generalization...then again, I know I've felt that way in the past.

Spook man, so sorry to hear that I'll toast a glass to you.

the big deal is. . . razor blades are fucking expensive and leg shaving is REALLY time consuming. It irritates my skin. It's something I really don't enjoy doing, and I don't see much benefit for myself. I'd rather spend my time doing something that actually benefits both of us and involves us spending time together. For example, I love cooking so I don't mind cooking meals for my significant other. I also will make time for us to go out and do something. I think this is a lot more beneficial to both partners than me simply complying and shaving my legs even though it's something expensive and time consuming and that I really don't want to do.

That's fine too, although having shaved my legs in the past (used to swim competitively) didn't seem that much of a hassle or expensive, especially given the task of shaving my face, but to each their own. What I was originally trying to say, however, is that the trade-off for your partner may be much higher than the inconvenience is to you. It's not a matter of "simply complying", neither person in a relationship should be that submissive, in my opinion.

[zyko]

even though at times he had a soul patch that looked lame as hell.

!@1!!!!!! nooooo I LOOOOVE MY soulpatch

[Jace]

even though at times he had a soul patch that looked lame as hell.

!@1!!!!!! nooooo I LOOOOVE MY soulpatch

Protip: soul patches have never looked cool or appealing on anyone. It just looks like a smear of hairy dirt on your face (no personal offense to zyko, whom I've never seen and don't know!). I'm sure some of you will say that soul patches are cool or these things or relative. Normally, I would agree with you totally, but on the matter of soul patches: incorrect.


Sorry to stink up what I usually call "the positivity and encouragement" thread, but this is serious bizness and I'm trying to help. Also it has rained for 6 days straight and I need some vitamin D.

[ironyengine]

I like best friends way more than girlfriends.

And I like my soul patch.

Fuck ya'll.

[ironyengine]

if i end up having a daughter, i might tell her to be a lesbian so that she won't get stuck dating scumbags.

At the risk of replying to more posts wayyyyy too late in the game, I like that you assume there are no female (or at least, lesbian) scumbags.

[mshell]

if i end up having a daughter, i might tell her to be a lesbian so that she won't get stuck dating scumbags.

At the risk of replying to more posts wayyyyy too late in the game, I like that you assume there are no female (or at least, lesbian) scumbags.

there are plenty of women scumbags. One of my good friends for instance. . . she's a good person most of the time, but she doesn't trust men. So she acts in ways that are untrustworthy toward them. She lies, she hides her feelings, and she always has one foot out the door in relationships. She thinks this is "high standards" and she seems to think no guy is ever going to meet her high standards. Weirdly though the only guys she is attracted to turn out to be douches that don't give her the time of day. Her assumptions then get confirmed, and she feels like she is justified in her mistreatment of men.

edit: For the record, in my experience, I see tons and tons of women doing shitty things to men just because they're being selfish and not considering the other person's feelings. Like one girl kept giving her ex attention because he paid for her dinners and was going to take her out and do fun stuff. She didn't consider that if she wasn't going to hang out with him, she should break it off soon to spare his feelings. Stuff like that.

[ironyengine]

there are plenty of women scumbags. One of my good friends for instance. . . she's a good person most of the time, but she doesn't trust men. So she acts in ways that are untrustworthy toward them. She lies, she hides her feelings, and she always has one foot out the door in relationships. She thinks this is "high standards" and she seems to think no guy is ever going to meet her high standards. Weirdly though the only guys she is attracted to turn out to be douches that don't give her the time of day. Her assumptions then get confirmed, and she feels like she is justified in her mistreatment of men.

This is not 'scumbag' so much as 'stupid.'

[Chibi_Ma]

there are plenty of women scumbags. One of my good friends for instance. . . she's a good person most of the time, but she doesn't trust men. So she acts in ways that are untrustworthy toward them. She lies, she hides her feelings, and she always has one foot out the door in relationships. She thinks this is "high standards" and she seems to think no guy is ever going to meet her high standards. Weirdly though the only guys she is attracted to turn out to be douches that don't give her the time of day. Her assumptions then get confirmed, and she feels like she is justified in her mistreatment of men.

This is not 'scumbag' so much as 'stupid.'

[zyko]

my soul patch makes me beautiful, dudes

[mshell]

there are plenty of women scumbags. One of my good friends for instance. . . she's a good person most of the time, but she doesn't trust men. So she acts in ways that are untrustworthy toward them. She lies, she hides her feelings, and she always has one foot out the door in relationships. She thinks this is "high standards" and she seems to think no guy is ever going to meet her high standards. Weirdly though the only guys she is attracted to turn out to be douches that don't give her the time of day. Her assumptions then get confirmed, and she feels like she is justified in her mistreatment of men.

This is not 'scumbag' so much as 'stupid.'

Oh, I definitely agree. But if a guy didn't know about her daddy issues or her motives, he would probably just assume she's a bitch. Her actions say "scumbag" even though deep down she's just scared.