26475 replies to this topic

[theDude.]

looking for a job with a better commute is like the scariest thing ever to me because the job market here sucks, i have a very narrow skill set, and not close to having a degree.
i am taking a course to get a certificate, but i heard those don't do anything anyway.

Searching for a job while you have a job has always seemed like a pretty ideal situation to me. You can take your time and find one that's a good fit for you without a lot of pressure to take the first opportunity that presents itself. Always keep your eye out for new opportunities. So far I've found the best way to get ahead in my career is to leverage my experience and do some job hopping rather than being a "company man" like our parents or grandparents. For me that meant taking a low paying job locally, putting in two years at a high paying job in a more urban area with a long commute, then leveraging the experience I gained there to get an even higher paying local job. Maybe it's not completely the same for your field, but in mine, experience seems to be way more valuable than any degree or certificate. So yeah, don't sell yourself short. Keep at it and keep your ear to the ground and you'll find something better.

That was rambly and not GIRLS! related.

I dated a much younger chick who was in college while I was working full time. She bitched constantly about me not spending time with her on weekdays. It didn't work out.

Also +1 for Moldilox's story.

Edit: Also, Demonstray, it sounds more like you dodged a good time rather than a bullet. It's pretty adorable that you're waiting for the right lady to give your flower to.

[cetera]

i kind of want moldi to record that post as well. i might be a little addicted to his readings...
i read the post in his tone and was not good enough. didn't get that high...

thanks guys for the advice. it all makes perfect sense. the job thing i will start creeping around to see what i can do.

as for the girl side. fuuuu. i don't know why i expected different answers. in the end, her youngness might reject the kind of compromises necessary to make this work.

this. is. fucked. up.
there's more bad shit going on than just the time thing:

after 2 attempted breakups on my part, i am finally ready to give her more of myself and come out from behind this wall i have.

then she meets this guy at my band's show last friday. some of you may have spied them hanging together. she has stated that he is her new buddy. and that i should be happy she was "socializing" while i was busy doing music stuff pretty much all night until pretty late.
at the point i was finally done everything, i show up at the after party house that i unwittingly sent her to due to a "mix up" of cars and dumb band shit. i find just her and him on the front step quietly talking. she didn't get up to hug me. this hurt my feelings for some reason. i was tired and wanted to leave so i got her out of there.

we talked about this, and him, and she made me feel a little better about the situation.

independently, i got informed about him and concluded that he was basically a hippie pick up artist.

i wake up with her monday morning and she is looking at her fb messages on her phone and i just happen to read a snippet of a message to her from the guy inquiring about her work schedule. then she shows me a message he sent her. it's a sleazy gross hippie song where every lyric is a vow on the part of the singer to make a girl his woman. we listened together and had a laugh.

later i spent the night over her house. she told me that she had made plans with the guy. he said he wanted to play some b-ball with her. we laughed again with a "he can't be serious" tone. i was pretty sure he wasn't serious though. i've done this same shit with girls. set up a friend date with a silly premise. so silly it doesn't work by design, so you just have a real date instead.

so we parted and i asked "when will i see you again," and she uncharacteristically said she didn't know. and for the 1st time i spent a whole day and night without hearing from her. i got to sleep early for the 1st time in a while, and my sleep was ruined by my basically obsessing over her and him. this is pretty uncharacteristic for me so i let it play out and i explored it. it was horrible to be sure. so incredibly horrible.

i finally just now texted her saying "i miss you"

i never thought i would feel this way, or be in this situation, which all of you will find pleasingly ironic because i was just posting how i wanted to be in this situation. but this girl aint a 10 for hotness, she's just a normal looking girl - that i happen to love.

ripping phone books and shit

[Spookmeister C]

Cetera - I think you're finally becoming a human with real emotions, good job.

Moldi - As long as you were gonna use protection, I don't see how that situation could have been bad. You should have been doing the Miami Sound Machine that night.

[cetera]

ways it could have been bad but not really

1 - she tells the boyfriend - right after or during the miami sound machine. the boyfriend comes to kill. this was her plan to bring out the monster that she always loved.

2 - she was referring to her poopie chucha

[Ryan8bit]

http://translate.goo...wT#es|en|chucha



I don't know why having the computer voice speak the words was so amusing.

[Moldilox]

Cetera - I think you're finally becoming a human with real emotions, good job.

Moldi - As long as you were gonna use protection, I don't see how that situation could have been bad. You should have been doing the Miami Sound Machine that night.

Haha, yea. Shit would have probably ended up being the Miami ZZZzzz Machine since she couldn't even stay awake at the bar after that, though!

Apparently these girls have about four other sisters in Hoboken. They all live a few blocks from me at most. Wanna meet those sisters.

[cetera]

my chalupa is sooo tight boy

put your skeen flauta innit rude boy

[Ranger-X]

i just made a post on fb about not being able to get to bed early enough lately. i really need to so i can stop being late for work.

what i couldn't mention on there was that my GF is basically the root of this problem.

after working full time, and then working on music wither with band or solo most every day, i finally get to hang with her when it's getting late.

i already had a relationship where i kind of fucked it up by not giving my SO a certain amount of time per day. i don't wanna go back to those dark times.

looking for a job with a better commute is like the scariest thing ever to me because the job market here sucks, i have a very narrow skill set, and not close to having a degree.
i am taking a course to get a certificate, but i heard those don't do anything anyway.

i feel like i'm getting squeezed hard. does anyone have experience in this area who can at least sympathize?

I can kind of sympathize in me and my SO having very little time to spend together, and sucks equally to be squeezed for time as it is to feel ignored. If you're having trouble making it a certain amount of time per day, how about trying to think about it per week? When I wasn't 6000 miles away from my old man, he worked two jobs, I worked weekends, and our schedules were basically opposite. The only time we got to talk was basically between 10 PM and 1 AM and that wasn't much. But every weekend we had one weekend day where we could sleep in together, then get up and go for breakfast or lunch. It was a ritual of ours. Even if I had to be at work at noon or 1, we would sleep till 11, grab a bite, and he would take me to work. Sometimes he would bring me lunch at work on a Saturday or Sunday so we had an hour together. Or if I had a day off during the week, I would bring him lunch at his job. It was really nice, something to look forward to during the week when we didn't get to hang out.

It seems like this is sort of the norm these days for 20-something couples, which is unfortunate. My last relationship was the same way with our completely opposite schedules, and it was an occasional sore spot for me. I've worked the typical 9 to 6 Monday to Friday routine for the past five years, and that's normal to me...but she worked nights, every day. I must be unlike most guys in that I actually do want to see my significant other as much as possible. Of course I can function on my own, but I think it's nice having someone to share life with, even the bad times. I never find myself needing space, so to speak.

[Rocquero]

cetera-

my ex had a guy she would "innocently" "hang-out" with and make jokes about their meetings in a "he can't be serious tone." when she broke up with me, she was immediately with that dude, b/c they had been the whole time.

the message of my story is not "she's cheating on you." the message is "my girl cheated on me because i let her and didn't trust my instincts about this dude/his intentions."

if you feel weird about it, it's because you should.

[arise_shine]

Moldi: sounds like she was out for a revenge fuck, or something of that sort. Was she too drunk to stay awake or something? Yeah, you can't hit that. I'm pretty sure that's legally rape in most locales, and either way it's just a horrible thing to do.

But yeah, "chucha" .. what a great word. It's amazing that even not knowing what it means, we pretty much all know exactly what it means.

[Klatrymadon]

Revenge fuck!

[cetera]

cetera-

my ex had a guy she would "innocently" "hang-out" with and make jokes about their meetings in a "he can't be serious tone." when she broke up with me, she was immediately with that dude, b/c they had been the whole time.

the message of my story is not "she's cheating on you." the message is "my girl cheated on me because i let her and didn't trust my instincts about this dude/his intentions."

if you feel weird about it, it's because you should.

i'm curious as to what good dudes do in this situation.

i won't be the guy who tells her who to hang with.

i feel my only option is to let her know how much pain i felt, and that i will continue to feel it as long as she hangs with him.

becoming friends with him is pretty much off the table for me because his massive violation of dude code and vile hippie ways have already put him in my mental dumpster. no man has ever climbed out of that place.

i was already plotting revenge against him when she finally texted me back earlier. i informed her that she had saved a phonebook's little life with that reply.

[Moldilox]

Moldi: sounds like she was out for a revenge fuck, or something of that sort. Was she too drunk to stay awake or something? Yeah, you can't hit that. I'm pretty sure that's legally rape in most locales, and either way it's just a horrible thing to do.

But yeah, "chucha" .. what a great word. It's amazing that even not knowing what it mean, we pretty much all know exactly what it means.

She didn't appear too drunk to stay awake until she... stopped staying awake! So yea, I was out at that point. Not interested.

[arise_shine]

Moldi: sounds like she was out for a revenge fuck, or something of that sort. Was she too drunk to stay awake or something? Yeah, you can't hit that. I'm pretty sure that's legally rape in most locales, and either way it's just a horrible thing to do.

But yeah, "chucha" .. what a great word. It's amazing that even not knowing what it mean, we pretty much all know exactly what it means.

She didn't appear too drunk to stay awake until she... stopped staying awake! So yea, I was out at that point. Not interested.

Huh .. narcoleptic then? That's weird.

Lol ... "chucha"

[cetera]

Moldi: sounds like she was out for a revenge fuck, or something of that sort. Was she too drunk to stay awake or something? Yeah, you can't hit that. I'm pretty sure that's legally rape in most locales, and either way it's just a horrible thing to do.

But yeah, "chucha" .. what a great word. It's amazing that even not knowing what it mean, we pretty much all know exactly what it means.

She didn't appear too drunk to stay awake until she... stopped staying awake! So yea, I was out at that point. Not interested.

i've had that happen too. i had no idea she was wasted until she passed out - also a latina - and some guy came over speaking in spanish and totally rescued her. i felt so super damn shitty about how nasty i was getting with her, too. all grabbin chucha in the middle of the party. fuck