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Depression And Other Social Issues


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#3871 Valence

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Posted 05 July 2017 - 03:02 PM

So...uhh...hate to break the current train of thought in the thread but...

 

Is it customary for a psychiatrist and/or psychologist to NOT tell their patient what they are suffering from while also treating them for that thing ?

 

Went to a doctor's appointment today and this is the second time this year that a physician inquired about me being Bipolar. I've never been diagnosed as being Bipolar. I don't really understand what is going on. The only way it could be in the chart is if I told them about being Bipolar, which I haven't, because I've always just described it as suffering from depression, among other things. The only other thing I can think of is that I've been this way all this time and nobody decided to clue me in, which seems super shitty. Wouldn't that knowledge be beneficial to actually fighting the thing they are trying to treat ? I guess I can kinda see why they would hide it from me due to other factors but then it just feels like I'm making excuses for others when it really feels like that information should have been made known to me. Hopefully it was just a clerical error, although, that would explain some things if it isn't just a clerical error. ugh    


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#3872 ShawnPhase

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Posted 06 July 2017 - 02:05 PM

this is getting so stupid

 


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#3873 the Wozz

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Posted 06 July 2017 - 02:15 PM

Dang. I don't know where my grey T-Square shirt is any more :( 


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#3874 C.C. Z28

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Posted 06 July 2017 - 02:29 PM

Somebody from T-Mobile stole it to wear to work


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#3875 the Wozz

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Posted 06 July 2017 - 03:19 PM

Somebody from T-Mobile stole it to wear to work

I will end them. 


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#3876 ShawnPhase

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Posted 06 July 2017 - 07:48 PM

i walked into the verizon store once wearing it and i got a dirty look from this girl who works there that i have my eye on. but i was like 'nonono, its a japanese prog band, tmobile is the master of mediocre!'. wish i had more reason to go into the verizon store :wub:


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#3877 ShawnPhase

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Posted 07 July 2017 - 03:00 AM

 

self representation eh


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#3878 Demonstray

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Posted 07 July 2017 - 04:32 AM

Just looking at the emails is very telling of where Alex is at, cognitively. "What is meant by the word 'respond'?"
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#3879 KarlGerm

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Posted 07 July 2017 - 10:23 AM

haven't had much time to check the Shizz recently and haven't caught up in this thread but wanted to say depression is a fuck and everyone who is going through it regularly is a fucking bad ass for carrying on. everyone in this thread is a bad ass and I hope everyone is doing okay. sending love and positive vibes your way, homies. stay strong


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#3880 DiscountBabyJam Mike

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Posted 08 July 2017 - 07:42 PM

Moaning
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#3881 thebeautyofgrind

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Posted 09 July 2017 - 05:53 PM

So, I'm at the point where too many things are just really breaking me and I dunno which is wearing me down more:

- Not identifying with people, even when in a crowd of like-minded people, I just feel like an outsider and I don't belong.

- Losing friends/family to addiction and having it be so common that I just stop reacting to it.

 

 

This year has been really hard:  

 

  1. Someone very close to me (my friend Dezirae whom I have posted about in the GIRLS! thread many-a-time) died due to an accident and it really, really got to me.  I haven't cried that much since my dad died when I was 11.  Everyone thought we were gonna get married, have kids, etc. and we even had a pact to do so if we weren't married by the time she was 30.  Well, around the time she was 28, she met the wrong people and became distant and experimented with drugs.  She had Fibromyalgia and ended up becoming addicted to her painkillers.  When she died, I didn't reach out to anyone and I was just so busy with things that I didn't have time to mourn.  I found out the day before I was supposed to go to Canada, a place she knew I loved and I would have loved to get her reactions to all the photos I took and all the stories while sharing them over a meal.
  2. My favorite uncle's 1 year anniversary of his passing was a couple weeks after Dez left us and my cousin is so manic and talks to me all the time about it that it just crushes me even more.
  3. We all know about Kain.  He and I talked pretty often and that really got to me, of course, like all of us.
  4. Now I find out that someone else I know who was a recovering addict had a relapse and her demon(s) won the battle.  So now with people I know dying I just feel more and more alone and I don't see any relief in sight.

I'm also socially stubborn and have that common social anxiety of just walking up to people and just striking up a conversation.  I also don't really wanna "go meet new people" mainly because I feel from experience that I won't see eye to eye with them or have similar interests.

 

I made a joke band called, "All My Friends Are Screen Names" a while back, but it's looking like it's becoming more and more my reality.


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#3882 Daemon9623

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Posted 09 July 2017 - 06:17 PM

My ability to keep my shit together completely failed last night and I broke down into a quivering mass of fuckeverythings. I haven't been able to shake it since and I've been a huge asshole to everyone around me. Outside of the surface things that entertain me, and looking forward to big events to see shizzies, I am, at my core, incredibly unhappy. I try not to hate myself for the fuckups I did, but if I were someone else I wouldn't like me after knowing what I know. Every day is a struggle to be a better person than I was, but I never feel like I make progress, and it feels like anything and everything that I do is either trying to make up for something horrible that I did, or I don't believe that I'm being sincere when I'm doing it and I feel like a total piece of shit. I just want to be better, in all aspects and contexts of the word.


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#3883 pingosimon

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Posted 09 July 2017 - 06:31 PM

DBJ Mike, I read it.  You said it - I think once you take some steps yourself you'll have success.  What's the first step?  Probably something pretty easy.  Force yourself to even take the smallest step to that first step.

 

 

Every day is a struggle to be a better person than I was, but I never feel like I make progress, and it feels like anything and everything that I do is either trying to make up for something horrible that I did, or I don't believe that I'm being sincere when I'm doing it and I feel like a total piece of shit. I just want to be better, in all aspects and contexts of the word.

Just keep being good - eventually there won't be a meaningful distinction between "I'm being good to make up for being bad" and "I'm a good person."

 

I'm kinda working on being more positive.  I have the opposite situation as you - I generally think highly of people on the inside, and wish the best for them.  But on the outside I can be really negative/criticizing.  Or at best, really introverted.

 

You've brought a super super positive vibe to every event I've seen you at!  That in itself is a "good" thing, regardless of the past.


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#3884 pingosimon

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Posted 09 July 2017 - 06:39 PM

oh, this is one of the best things I've read.  For depression - or just for productivity in general!

 

https://www.reddit.c...he_four_pillars


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#3885 weener

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Posted 09 July 2017 - 10:02 PM

Daemon, it is HUGE that you a) have taken responsibility for your fuckups, and b ) are actively working to be a better person. It's enormous. Most people never get to that point.


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