you gotta be willing to compromise a ton when you work with other dudes. in the end, the best thing you can do is to experiment and try whatever, but keep your idea of the finished product in mind, however you come across it isnt as important as if you find your way there. drummer being a control freak aint a bad scene at all if its a creative experience, ask anybody ive played with. if the drummer is open to experimenting, you're allowing the drummer to have a say in the arrangement, you know? they dont get a lot to say in a song really, so you allow the drummer his space in arrangement stage, and you're gonna have a happier drummer. if nothing else, do what he's asking, try it out, then when everybody agrees its not good enough, its back to the drawing board. the time investment and feeling like wheels are spinning can be annoying, but if you get something good out of it thats due to experimenting, its that kinda experience that makes a band a band, you know?
Reading back through previous conversation, realized I forgot to reply to this. I normally would be open to that, because, ya know, creative license and all. But in the case of the previous post, he changed the part without consulting us. He then recorded it, and expected us to redo our parts to match the recording, just so that he didn't have to re-record. And he just did it again...except this time, he changed the drum part for an entire song, with the new beat being much more complicated than the previous one, and IMO ruining the groove. IMO there was nothing wrong with the old beat which he had been playing since the beginning.
The bigger problem for me is that the other guitar player sees no issue with it. In fact, he likes the new parts better. I disagree.
So. Going to suggest that we take a break from recording and discuss the future of this project. Maybe I'll get to work on my own stuff in the meantime. I've strongly considered putting together my own band, in fact, but have no experience as a band "leader".