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The Shizz 500 Games of Time

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#1 thecreeper

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Posted 08 December 2017 - 10:36 PM

shizz,

 

perhaps you've seen some recent attempts to make a comprehensive list of games. all i can say is its certainly an undertaking and there are a lot of games. a lot of games! i'm feeling overwhelmed and i want to lie down. 

 

but! but i'm confident that the shizz dot org slash forums can make a list of games that definitely existed. a list of games that someone probably played! we need lists! the rules here are as follows:

 

- decrement the list

- the game probably should have been released

- maybe you should have played it once?

- first come first serve. respect rule of "first"

 

ok time to start. #500, i know you are excited

 

 

 

Thumb_Iron_-_Blood-_Warriors_of_Ravenlof

 

500. Advanced Dungeons & Dragons: Iron & Blood - Warriors of Ravenloft

(1996, Playstation)

 

My brother rented this game back when it came out. It was a fighting game and he said "i want to play a fighting game for my Playstation, I just bought this." he rented it from the local A-Z Video Store in Kendig Square near us. It's not there anymore. It was a 3 day rental that we got on Friday, and returned Sunday night. The game wasn't very good but we played a lot of matches. I remember the controls being terrible and sluggish. I didn't know what Dungeons & Dragons was at that time. He returned it, and we never played it again.

 

 

looking forward to 499 and below.....................................................

 

THE LIST SO FAR:

 

Spoiler

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I broke down and watched Showgirls. Can anyone help me.


#2 mig50

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 12:14 AM

zach
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you mean you forgot cranberries too?

#3 ShawnPhase

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 12:21 AM

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#4 raubhimself

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 12:35 AM

499. Dewy's Adventure
(2007, Wii)
 
This was a somewhat early game for the Wii made by Konami. I played it for a few hours when it came out. I never beat it but have been meaning to give it another go for like 5 years. It really leaned into the motion controls, using a tilt mechanic to control how the titular character, Dewy, moves around the levels. Kind of like Super Monkey Ball, which I was a huge fan of at the time (perhaps we'll see a Super Monkey Ball game later on this list). It's a weird tilt-based platformer that uses mechanics that alter the environment and thus Dewy. Did I mention Dewy is a drop of dew? You can freeze him or make him mist, I think. But don't take my word for it. Here's a high quality youtube review. 
 


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sanitize.deodorize.pulverize
MINIBOSSIES NEVAR SAY DIE!
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'the smuggest amongst us will always be the quickest to point out the most minor transgressions of others around them'- a quote i just made up and put quotes around to make it seem slightly fancier


#5 thecreeper

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 05:06 AM

498. Tetris 2
(1993, NES)
It's the mid-90s and Hills is going out of business. My brother, a hardcore Tetris player on NES, saw Tetris 2 on clearance and spent the 10 dollars on it. It wasn't very good! We didn't know anything about it at the time, and it was basically just a Dr Mario clone wearing the skin of Tetris. In an era where we had almost no games and we played even bad games forever, Tetris 2 was quickly set aside and forgotten.

Here's a...good god, 4 hour longplay of it? Sure.


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I broke down and watched Showgirls. Can anyone help me.


#6 Ken Oh

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 05:07 AM

Rank 498 is too high for Tetris 2.
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#7 MegaMatt

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 09:52 AM

497. Alfred Chicken

(1994, NES)

 

This was purchased brand new from the bargain bin at Wal-Mart. You play as a radical red chicken that explodes into feathers as soon as you touch anything. It took me a while just to figure out how to attack enemies, because jumping on them kills you and pecking at them is also useless. Eventually I realized you have to dive bomb them by doing a ground pound maneuver from above. Later on you come across a projectile item that shoots out of you at a downward 45-ish degree angle, so there's that too. Your goal is to free all the green balloons in a level and you will then be transported to the end level screen or a boss fight. The main bad guys are called Meka Chickens but they look like giant robotic grenades. The color scheme for a lot of the levels is a mess of ugly dark browns, greens, and/or yellows. Pretty much nothing here is visually appealing. I'm pretty sure this was the very last NES game I bought before I traded my NES collection in for a Super NES. All in all, Alfred Chicken is definitely a video game that was released on one or more consoles.

 


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 Hooky fuck I picked a great taco Bell. The woman at the front of the line is painstakingly asking every price, she just ordered a cheesy horror crunch with just cheese and sorcery nothing else, Questor with just beef nothing else, one soft Teddi with 3x cheese, double sour Satan, nothing else. Quivering now the man behind her orders a taxi BVSc to Yusuf Khan, two tweaks with dignity Leuven and no beef??? And a cheesy fissure crunch with extra extra Chertsey and chickenpox nothing else. Fucking hell people it's taco vein not your last meal on earth


#8 pIENESS

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 10:07 AM

496. GON (with the wind, cuz nobody was there. had to back 'em up with a fist metal crackle.?) {super family computer console, japan only '94}



I played this game for a second and then handed the controller over to magicalyardgnome. We couldn't really figure it out. It's like EVO on acid with no life or menu bar indicators. Nothing. You may as well send a mf-ing tamagucci(yeah, i spelled it correctly) to mars and back before you try to play this game. It's extremely minimal and atmospheric including the ost. It will never be as good as Joe & Mac. There is a section that is very reminiscent of that sonic bonus stage with the red and blue balls. Oh yeah, mode seven? Also, a fun fact: Gon is like a manga series or something. I think they may have released some playstation titles as well. It's pretty good. 

 


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#9 joe.distort

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 10:54 AM

Here's a...good god, 4 hour longplay of it?


Legit lolling over here
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(it involves satan disguising himself as a bird who unlocks police cars!)

FOLLOW NOW

#10 ErichWK

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 10:58 AM

Gon looks pretty fun
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I play drums, Make Video Games, and eat Hamburgers.


#11 Robby V

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 11:51 AM

You can play as Gon in one of the Tekken games


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#12 Magicalyardgnome

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 01:38 PM

496. GON (with the wind, cuz nobody was there. had to back 'em up with a fist metal crackle.?) {super family computer console, japan only '94}



I played this game for a second and then handed the controller over to magicalyardgnome. We couldn't really figure it out. It's like EVO on acid with no life or menu bar indicators. Nothing. You may as well send a mf-ing tamagucci(yeah, i spelled it correctly) to mars and back before you try to play this game. It's extremely minimal and atmospheric including the ost. It will never be as good as Joe & Mac. There is a section that is very reminiscent of that sonic bonus stage with the red and blue balls. Oh yeah, mode seven? Also, a fun fact: Gon is like a manga series or something. I think they may have released some playstation titles as well. It's pretty good. 

 

 

Much like Yoshi, Gon has a flutter jump and a butt stomp, but Gon is a game that predates Yossy Island for Super Famicom. Yoshi, your secret is out.

 

The whole ost is drums, ErichWK please cover.


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#13 mooniniteG

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 02:00 PM

494. Board Game: Top Shop
(1998, PS1)
 

 
I bought this at Hollywood Video new for $5 or $10. It's like playing Monopoly when no one has read the rules. Figuring out how the game works is half the battle and half the fun. Back in high school, my friends and I would regularly play this until 2, 3, or even 4 AM on weekends. It was probably my most played game during my high school years. Unfortunately, attempts to get new people to play have been unsuccessful. Forum users like Eric Dude have dismissed this game with strong disdain.


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#14 Beef-Clef

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 02:49 PM

493. Killing Zone
(1996, PS1)


My brother bought me this game one day on his way home from school, he said it made him think of me, which was a good feeling. I got mad excited cuz we were both really into fighting games at the time, and so I turned it on and I was surprised that it sucked hard. I wanted to like it, though, so I played the shit out of it and grew to like it. It had a character maker thing in it, which was cool, so I made a character and would spend a lot of time levelling and customizing him. A couple months ago I went to my bro's place and he had this game going, he was like "Remember this game?" I said "Of course" and sat down.

P.S. He got me this in for my 16th birthday in 1997, he couldn't have had more than $8 to his name, so if this game was that cheap a year after its release it says a lot about the quality. I loved this game tho...


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#15 Beef-Clef

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Posted 09 December 2017 - 03:02 PM

492. Battle Arena Toshinden 2

(1995, PS1)

Another PS1 fighting game I was into as a kid. I got this game used in Chinatown for $4 in 1995. I played the living shit out of it for a month and then sold it back to the same store for $3 because I wanted money to get home (I would frequently go into Chinatown with only enough money for a one way trip via subway, so I'd bring something with me to sell so I could get the $1.25 for the ride home and another $1 for some fried rice from someone with a filthy cart). Anyway after a few more weeks I went back and bought it again for $4, and after a few weeks sold it for $2. I repeated this process about 5-6 more times over the next couple years. 

It was normal to find a fly in your fried rice or lomein, since it was just an old chinese man with a cart walking the streets cooking the stuff for $1 per customer. The last time I sold the game, we were walking towards the same old man to buy our usual fried rice before taking the train home, and as we're approaching him we see him dropping his spatula into a puddle in the gutter, in NYCs Chinatown near the R train on Grand Street, possibly the dirtiest gutter in the world, and he picks the thing up and goes RIGHT BACK INTO the rice he's cooking. We turned around and decided to use our money on Marvel Super Heroes vs Street Fighter in Chinatown fair.



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