sounds like you've got yourself some fried chicken yo
put on a coat and gloves
catch that freedom lover
lay him gently over a flat, hard surface
put an ax to his neck quickly
defeather and clean
fry
eat
enjoy your freedoms
and tell your neighbor he must have flown away.......
to heaven
not having grown up on a farm, i don't have any idea how to defeather and clean a bird. it's a skill i've considered learning, but have never pursued. you know, on account of chicken being available defeathered and cleaned pretty much everywhere. i'm sure i'll regret this if i survive the apocalypse and i need to kill and dress chickens for food. well, assuming a bunch of chickens survive, too. oh, also, i don't have an axe. or a coat, for that matter. it's phoenix, jacki.
pussy
yeah, i guess.
i was too busy fucking bitches when i was younger to learn all that shit.
baller
im just joking with you
if you dont want to kill a chicken, you dont have to, no shame in that.
just go back over to your neighbor and be like 'I cant get it out, come over and get your fucking rooster yo'
i know you're joking. but i'll take every opportunity to brag about all the sex.
i wouldn't even mind killing it, but i literally don't have an axe (when i brought this up to my wife, she said "well, we have a hammer" - yikes). i just don't want to bother. my neighbor and i will be having a "hey, you need to come get this guy out of my yard" talk when he gets home from work.
EDIT: oh, and yes, i've been referring to it as "the cock". and i try to make it as creepy as possible when i talk about it.
i have an axe.
jus sayin.
And i'm hungry.
Plus, you could employ the "grab and spin" method as well. You just grab it by the head and give it a good hard spin which breaks the neck and you're good to go. Then slit the throat, drain the blood, soak it in water which will loosen the feathers a bit. Pluck, marinate, grill, THEN invite me over, enjoy.
