I've actually seen Beetlejuice and Heathers! I watched Beetlejuice last year because someone (possibly you, Ian?) posted a gif of the scene where the dude has eyeballs on his hands on a Facebook thread and I didn't get it.
There are some things that are a hard line for me. Indy's defense of statutory rape in the first several minutes of the movie kind of prevented me from enjoying the rest of the movie. Plus all the racism.
I just watched a video on changing the air filter just to make myself mad. While, with 3 more years of experience, it doesn't look that hard, trying to do it knowing that your boss is going to yell at you if you don't check the filter plus the other 50 things on the inspection within 15 minutes was a nightmare.
-I figured I'd lighten things up after last week and Rambo with another war movie set in Asia (plus I want something short so I can get back to Untitled Goose Game)
-All I know about this is that it's about some chick who dresses as a dude to lead an army or impress her dad or something and her male boss gets a little bi-curious about her
-I got this big vegan fried chicken sandwich and animal-style fries from some new joint in my neighborhood, but I'll try not to let it distract me from the movie
-Is this thing she's doing with the ink the ancient version of writing band names on your arm in Sharpie? I can relate.
-Oh, she's cheating on some sort of lady test
-"PLEASE BRING HONOR TO US ALL! Mono-D'OH!"
-Does she get a lucky cricket and a dumb dog? Two sidekicks?
-AND a dragon? The luckiest Disney princess.
-Is the dragon Black? OK.
-Horses don't look like horses onscreen, they have to use cows
-Yes, I have heard that walking like a man is the hardest part of convincing male impersonation
-Just say you're Fa Zhou's illegitimate son by a side piece
-This movie has a lot of people's teeth falling out, it's probably going to give me nightmares
-That Hun wants to give the girl her doll back, how nice. They don't seem so bad.
-She can see all their dicks, nice
-"I never want to see another naked man again...except this one."
-I guess they had some high-ass quality rope back in those days. Silk, probably, which is stronger than steel, definitely enough to support 2 people, a horse, and all their sidekicks
-The cricket is the dragon's sidekick. Double sidekicks.
-"Ugly Concubines" is a good band name
-Mulan, if you're any kind of woman, go for the big fat guy soldier instead of your hunky commanding officer. He may not have great abs but he looks like he's more fun.
-If only the sword of Shan-Yu and the crest of the emperor were enough to forgive the crime of being a woman in real life.
That was fine, kind of cute, but also kind of dumb. About what I expected. I liked Moana more. I'd say Moana and Up were the only Disney movies I can really get behind. But this one was...fine. Probably in my top five of Disney movies, which as I said are not really my thing.